My History

 My history surrounds me
 And it's closing in around my bed
 And all I have known
 Has turned to sticks and to stones
 But these words are wandering in my head

 I've got you paper for ten
 Not the kind tradition meant
 But the kind that says
 I'm walking out that door
 And my heart breaks in two
 A little for me and a little for you
 Still this thing
 Is just the thing I've got to do

 For so long I was on my own
 Seeking shelter from what I've known
 Like the last leaves of the fall's lasting breeze
 Waiting for it all to drop
 Like a big new year's ball
 With just a past and a song for the lost

 I've got you paper for ten
 Not the kind tradition meant
 But the kind that says
 I'm walking out that door
 And my heart breaks in two
 A little for me and a little for you
 Still this thing
 Is just the thing I've got to do

 Now the glass has filled with sand
 I look down and don't know my own hands
 I thought that surely the answers would be revealed
 We'd know it'd all been for the better
 The hurt's past like a forgotten winter
 But I'm haunted by these words instead
 When I say it

 I've got you paper for ten
 Not the kind tradition meant
 But the kind that says
 I'm walking out that door
 And my heart breaks in two
 A little for me and a little for you
 Still this thing
 Is just the thing I've got to do

 Still this thing is just the thing that I've
 It's just the thing that I've gotta do