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Baker Maultsby


The Lyrics

Four Wal-Marts
Maultsby/ Peter Cooper
(dedicated to John W. Cooper)

lead guitar/bass: Richard McLaurin*
acoustic guitar, drums: Baker Maultsby
harmony vocals: Jim Lauderdale**

Strip malts on both sides of the street
Asphatt on top of concrete
We're fifteen miles from the county seat
But man, we've really got it made
We got a new traffic circle on the north side of town
My haby likes to go and ride around and around
Pickv her up when she gets down
And washes her btues away

We got four Wal-Marts
In the tri-county area
An outlet mall
It's bargain hysteria
Anew Burger King so our kids get jobs
We don't need you big city snobs
It's small town America

We got a cement confederate we march on by
In our big parade on the 4th of July
The old money folks and the neckus redekai
We're bursting at the searns
They closed the door on the five and dime
But the west side's growing like a kudzu vine
Standing for an hour in the Applehee's line
'Cause we know what it means

Repeat Chorus

Maybe the downtown has seen its better days
But think of all of the money we can save
A free market free-for-all
Has come to save the day
Join your local wholesale club
Cr get out of oar way

We've got four Wal-Marts
In the tri-county area
An outlet mall
It's bargain hysteria
We got a HP with a cappuccino machine
An Exxon attached to a Dairy Queen
'Cause it's small town, mall town America
It's small town America
Strip malls on both sides of the street
Asphalt on top of concrete

Fathack and Egg on Bun Maultsby/Cooper

Hull's Grill is a real place in Una, South Carolina. They painted menu selections on the outside walt

all instruments, including order-up hell: Baker
harmony vocals: Peter Cooper
voice of the waitress: Kit Maultshy

Drivin' north of Spartaubueg, west of Boiling Springs
I was feeling kind of famished, getting hunger pangs
I saw Hall's Grill in the comer of my eye
And I thought I'd go is for a piece of potpie
The waitress sald, "Honey, we ain't got none of that.
But I'll tell you what we do, and I'll tell you where it's at"

We got fatback and egg on bun
I suggest you get it with a little bit of run
What do you know about that?
The lay of the chicken and the back of the fat

Well I looked all around that eating place
There was folks everywhere with smiles on their face
I sald, "Ma'am I'll have whatever they got."
She brought it on oat and I liked it a lot

It was fatback and egg on bun
I like mine with a hole bit ofrun
What do you know about that?
The lay of the chicken and the back of the fat

I said fatback
Fatback and egg on bun
That's the one

Well I'll tell you for the truth, it's a sare-nuff treat
It ain't quite a vegetable, it ain't quite a meat
It was pnre-T fat, it weren't no streak of lean
But it's now a dally part of my breakfast routine

teat fatback and egg on bun
I like mine with a little bit of mu
What do you know about that?
The lay of the chicken and the back of the fat

I said fatback
Fatback and egg on bun
All right, that's the one

"Go 1:30!"


At a Spartanburg-area junior high school, they hare a class that gets out at 1:30 instead of 3:00 because they are too rough to ride the bus with the other kids. They're known among the student population as "The 1:30 Class." When they Strut through the halls on the way to their bus, other children have been known to yell, "Go 1:30!"

lead guitar: Roy Brooks
rhytbm guitars/drums/tambourine: Baker
bass: Don McGraw
haruony vocals: Peter and Baker

They put us in here 'cause we can't get along
But we don't see how we've done nothing wrong
It could have been a knife, or it could have been a gun
They don't understand our kind of fun
They're all scared ofus' cause we're not too stable
So they lock us in a room, and they give us a label
Well we might be mean, hut we're misunderstood
There ain't much love in our neighborhood

We're just 15 hut we got our own plan
And all the other kids are in the palm of our hand
'Cause we take the short bus and we go home early
All the kids scream, "Go 1:30!"
On 1:30
Go 1:30, go!

They can't deal with us 'cause we got a bad head
Most of them think we'd he hetter off dead
What we'll do next there ain't no telling
Whatcha gonna do with a teenage felon?
All they can do it to try and contain us
'Cause when we screw it up
They know they can't blame us
They slap us on Ibe wrist 'cause we're out of our minds
I've been suspended 36 tlmes

All the little kids arejust shakin' in fear
list when we walk by they all stop and cheer
'Cause we do what we want and we talk real dirty All the kids scream, "Go 1:30!"
Go 1:30
Go 1:30, go!

You never walked in our shoes
You never lived in our brains
Our social worker says
That she feels our pain
The smarts we've got
The manners we lack
We've been kicked around
And we like to kick back

We'rejust 15 but we've got our own plan
And all tbe other kids are in tbe palm of one band
'Cause we do what we want and we talk real dirty
All the kids scream, "Hey, go 1:30!"
Go 1:30
Go 1:30, go!

Bingo = Sin

The female harmony vocals here come from Fayssoux McLean, who sang on records with Emmylou Harmi, Dolly Parton
and now us.

lead guitar: Roy
steel: Glenn Miller
aconstic guitar: Peter
bass: Don
drnms: Baker
harnony voeals: Fayssoux McLean, Peter, Baker

People used to know you don't get rich
For doing nothing
But now they're walking in line
Through the doors of the Devil's den
They lay their money down
And listen for tbe numbers
People used to know
That bingo is a sin

They used to gamble at a pool hall
Down on Main Street
But the sheriff sbut 'em down
Just as soon as he got wind
They say it's different now
It'sjust good, clean entertainment
And the county council's waiting to cash in


Bingo is a sin

All the young folks, they've forgotten
Where they come from
And we send them off to school
Where they learn how to pretend
That it's just fine to believe
In what they want to
And that in this world
Bingo ain't a sin

Repeat Chorus

So many people inthistown
Are feeling beaten
BuI tliey're sining in the parlors
Hoping they might win
Tense and silent
As they listen for the numbers
They beat their fists against the table
When the winning card checks in
There aln't a winner in the building, mister
Bingo is a sin

repeat chorus twice

People used to know
that bingo is a sin

Sptit Level Woman
Clarence Ahercrombie/John Lane/Maultsby/Cooper

Ab John composed much of this as a country waltz. iter and/fiddled around with it until it began to get sitated.

lead guitar: Roy
rbytm guitars/basslextraneous gas/drums: Baker
harmony vocals: Peter

There's a blue print on my coffee table
Like the blue blood running through her veins
I'm yelling and cussing a blue streak
'Cause my ball team's loosing the game
Yeah, I spilled my beer on her dream house
I smudged and I drowned alt her plans
Then I crumpled up that page and threw it
In a pile with my empty beer cans

She's a split-level woman
And I'm a mobile home man
I'd rather have a Bud in my belly
Than to wear her ring on my hand
I tried not to hurt her
But she wouldn't understand
She's a split-level woman
And I'm a mobile home man

On Sundays I watch the pro football
There's nothing that I'd rather do
She came in all dressed up liken sweet thing
Said "Honey, I been wanting you."
I sat there watching that football
She stood there looking real blue

The Packers was whippin' the Raiders
In the bedroom she's packing too

Repeat chorus

Laura Ashley is packed into Samsonite
She's leaving me quick as can be
She's taking her Claude Mon/i paintings
They look out of focus to me

Repeat chorus

She's a split-level woman
And I'm a mobile home man



Kids today love donkeys. This one 's for them.

acoustic guitar/hass/drums: Baker
electric guitar: Roy
steel: Glenn
harmony vocals: Fayssoux, Peter, Baker

Tend the horse, milk the cow
Do your chores, boy, you know how
Get on in the stable and run that plow
Mend that picket fence
You know how, because
Grandpa says if we do our chores
We can ride Dusty into town

Help me set the table, help me shuck the corn
Is that gravy ready?
Yes ma'am, it's pretry warm
Fry up that okra and watch them rolls
Go ahead and eat, y'all
Before it gets cold, because
Grandma says if we clean our plates
We can ride Dusty into town

Feed the chickens, tend the horse
The clock's ticking, boy, do your chores
Then get on in the house and eat your green beans
Grandpa's in the stable and you know what that means, 'cause
Grandma says if we clean our plates
We can ride Dusty into town
Don't you want to ride him into town
Ride that donkey right on into town

Good Girl Gone Bad

lead guitar: Roy
rhythm guitars/surf guitar/bass/drums: Baker
organ: Russ
harmony vocals: Peter

She came from across the tracks
Wearing them high-dollar slacks
Paluted nalls and a bow in her halr
All the hoodlum boys just stared

She's a good girl gone bad
Good girl gone bad

She traded her wristwatch for a ten inch blade
Switched to liquor from lemonade
Got a tartoo about yea long
How could a girl go so wrung?

Repeat cliQiaLs

I told her to go back home
She said, "Man, leave me alone"
Being bad is in my blood
I wouldn't change it if I could

Teu long months for robbing a store
She's been there eight, she's got two more
With no rime off for good behavior
Too bad I couldn't save her

Repeat chorus

The Taco BeBe

About unattractive waitress at Monwrrev Merican Restaurant, Fernwood Drive, Spartanburg, South Camlina.

lead guitar: Roy
rhythm guitars/drums/bass: Baker
organ: Russ Morin
harmony vocals: Peter

Beef burrito and refried beans
Hot sauce ned the girl of my dreams
Spanish rice and a cheese qaesadilla
I came in thinking I might see you
She took my order
That's when I fell
For that taco belle

Pork fajita, tostaguac
"Excuse me sir, the plate is hot"
House band: mariachi
Got me feelin' kind of ranochy
I love her smile
I love her smell
I love my taco belle

Watch her walk, she can move those hips
White your up, baby, bring me more chips
Two Dos Equis. How 'bout a toast?
Whaddaya mean by adios?
She's good as gold
She's bad as hell
I love my taco belle

Pee Dee Man

electric guitar: Roy
acoustic guitar: Peter
bass: Don
drums: Baker
harmony vocals: Peter, Fayssoux

South Carolina, one of the 13 original cobalt
Is a small but geographically diverse state
Upstate counties are inns economic boom
Of industrial growth and foreign investment
While the low country city of Charleston
Boasts rich history and culture
But the Pee Dee, named for an ancient Ia/ins
And the big 'ol slow moving river bearing ib
Is the flat, sandy home
To many proud folks

They're flocking to the Piedmont
To Greenville and Spartanbueg
They're working for the Germans
And living in the suburbs
But this tobacco field
Is where I'm gonna make my stand
You can keep BMW
I'm a Pee Dee man

I'm a Pee Dee man
I farm them fields of golden brown
Like my daddy and his daddy
I work that sandy ground
I'm an Hurry County buy
That's where I want tube
Sandlapper by birth
But by the grace of God Pee Dee

I crossed this state on Highway 9
On a trip I took one lime
I sow the lulls and the textile mills
And it suited me just fine
I look account of the counties
From Lockhart to Cherow
Balmy blood got to pumping
In the land of the Woccomow

Reneat chorus

You can take Highway 501
From Horence to the beach
Through the forests of the Swamp Fox
Man, there's history in them trees
And there's blackwater rivers
Running through this fertile land
And there's Darlinglon and dirt tracks
And go carts at the strand
The Grand Strand

Well the upstate, the midlands
And the low country ignore us
Bat the pride of the Palmerto State
Is Mullins, Marion and Loris
And as for northem industry
I don't give a cuss
I soy keep the Southland beautiful
put a Yankee on a bus

Rereot chorus

I sald Sandlapper by birth
But by the grace of God Pee Dee

Love's Refugee

John Lane isa poet.

acoustic guitar: Baker
steel: Glenn
harmony vocals: Fayssoux, Peter

The news is telling me that Bosom could last
Lebanon's on the buruer and they're taming up the gas
But this fire fight down in my heart
Has got them all surpassed

I'm love's refugee
She opened up her big guns on me
You might say I'm scared
I claim I'm free
Call me love's reingee

I've toiled in the wasteland of this barren love affair
And I know I'm gonno perish if I don't take hence care
So I run from paln and hide from love
Baby I don't dare

Repeat chorus

My baby says a nuptial cease fire could be in view
Bat I'm holding in the trenches, her peace plan's nothing new
So keep the borders open
I'll soon be pushing through

Repeat chorus

Ah Can Do It

Baker: rhythm guitar, bass, drums
Roy: lead guitar
Dan Maultaby, Kit Maultshy, Peter: hacking vocals

Who can catch a crocodile? (Ah can do it!)
Has a pet reptile? (Ah condo it!)
Make the little children smile? (Ah can do it!)
If Ah can do it, you can do it too.
Who knows the Africans? (Ah can do it!)
Been to the hinteriand? (Ah con do it!)
Friends with a bush man? (Ah con do it!)
If Ah can do it, you can do it too.

He's a honky-tonk man with a PhD.
He can cross the river, he can climb a tree
He condo what he wants
So he does what he can
Clarence Abererombie is a mighty, mighty man

Who can write a trucker song? (Ah can do it!)
Tell you 'bout the Amazon? (Ah can do it!)
Sleeps with his boots on?!! (Ah condo it!)
If Ah condo it, you can do it too.

He's a good ole boy with a PhD.
He's just the way that we want to be
He can do what he wants
So he does what he can
Clarence Abererombie is a mighty, mighty man

Who's a great American? (Ah con do it!)
A humanitarian? (Ah can do it!)
Who's a big sports fan? (Ah can do it!)
Explain relativity? (Ah condo it!)
Who can eat collard greens? (Ah can do it!)
Who can catch a crocodile? (Ah can do it!)

Diggin' Up Bones
Overstreet/Gore (Writers Group Music/Scarlet Moon
Music/Sowgrass Music Publishers, Inc. (A Div. Of Musiptex
Group, Inc.)/ Lawyer's Daughter Music (A Div. Of The
MTM Music Gruap) BMI

I like Randy Travis'Storms of Life album. This isa reworking of the song that helped launch the illfotrd "New Traditionalist" movement in country music.

lead guitar: Matthew Knights
rhythm guitars/drums: Baker
bass: Todd Camp
harmony vocals: Peter, Fayssoux, Baker

Produced by Peter Cooper and Richard McLaurln

All songs except "Diggin' Up Bones" copyright 1998, MaulIsby-Cooper Publishing

Thanks to the musicians and songwriters:
Ab Abererombie, Roy Brooks (the garbage man from
Honohon), Todd Camp (who also provided bass
maintenance assistance), Peter Cooper, Tim Kane,
Matthew Knights, John Lane, Jim Lauderdale, Don
McGraw, Richard McLourin, Fayssoux McLean, Glenn
Miller, and Russ MoAn,

This album is inspired by some true-life heroes:
Gerald Duncan, Jim Lauderdale, Jason and the
Scorchers, Ab Abererombie, Terry Allen, Southern
Culture on the Skids, Jonathan Richman, Matthew
Knights, and Walter Salas-Humar.

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